Why do I always feel like I am breaking the law when I go into the DMV*? Maybe I am?
Q: Weight
A: Sure. Last time I got on a scale when I was skinny. I don't feel too bad about this, everyone fibs a bit.
Q: Address?
A: New Address... even though we don't technically live there for awhile longer. That's ok right??? I think
Q: Do you have a medical power of attorney or living will?
A: YES I DO! errr no, no I don't. Why did I say I did? Does this count as a will? Chip pull the plug. Whatever you do, do not freeze my body, in hopes science will find a cure. But before you pull it... can you put some liquefied canned cheese in my feeding tube. Thanks.
Q: Do you wear glasses when you drive
A: YES I DO! Err.. no..only when I watch TV. Another fib. When she took me to the eye test area, I got very nervous. Sweating bullets. They are going to lock me up and take away my license because i cannot see anything!
You can imagine my relief when she handed over my new license. Even if the picture looks like I am 12.
*Bureau of Motor Vehicles. In Ohio, we think "Department" does not carry as much clout as "Bureau", you see.
2 comments:
O man.. you are totally gonna get arrested for all of this.. falsifying offical documents, lying to a government official, cheating on your eye exam!! I can't believe you had the nerve to post this on the internet. Don't you know the DMV scans blogs daily in hopes of catching people admitting to their crimes! Expecte a knock on your door... o wait.. nevermind.. they don't really know where you live.
Happy Dirty 30 Jennifer. Welcome to the club! Hopefully someone will set off fireworks in your honor today!
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